The fire you actually crave comes from never leaving home.
From working on THIS; not that.
Because THIS is all there is and that will adjust accordingly.
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Self Abandonment
The Denser It Gets (An Essay)
when you perpetually self-abandon
the denser it gets
and when you do this over an extended period of time
that density
that was once only energetic
becomes matter
becomes ‘illness’ (both mental and physical)
because your system was not designed for such a deviation
it was designed to let you know all you need to know
to remain clean and intact
forevermore
so when you choose to ignore that knowing
over and over and over again
your brilliant system will turn up the volume until it can’t be ignored
until you have no choice but to honour what you know and have always known
(you ALWAYS know)
so even your ‘sickness’ (both mental and physical)
is still your system being brilliant as fuck
it never fails you
even when you ‘fail’ (deny) yourself
it speaks to you
for as long as it takes
until you finally listen
and choose to obey
and once you do
the ‘sickness’ dissolves
because it only arose
to point the way home
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Twisted (An Essay)
One must abandon themselves in the attempt to ‘fill’ through external means what can only be satisfied internally through learning how to not self-abandon in the first place.
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Abandoned (Mandy Bite)
You only need to 'cope' when you choose to leave home.
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Twisted Sticky Shit (An Essay)
You can’t have an expectation / demand / condition for how or when another person should behave for or in response to you…
and call that love.
You can’t point to what you’ve done for them (gross) in comparison to what you think they’ve yet to reciprocate (eww) as a way to justify why they should now perform / abandon / contort themselves for you like you clearly did for them (why else would you be keeping score)…
and call that love.
That’s manipulation.
Control.
Twisted, sticky, icky shit.
If it’s not given freely,
truthfully,
lovingly,
unconditionally…
why would you even want it?
You’d rather a performance than the real deal?
You’d rather have it the way your ego scripted it than the way it actually is?
You’d rather another do for you what you’re not willing to do for yourself?
Absurd.
People can move and exist as they wish.
You’re free to do the same.
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Self Abandonment 101 (One Minute Clip)
Watch the captioned video above or listen to the downloadable link below.
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Relationships Don't Need Work (An Essay)
Relationships don’t need to be ‘worked on’.
Nor do they require any level of sacrifice.
It’s not necessary.
Or energetically sound.
The vibe of trying,
reaching,
abandoning
(even just a little)
for or because of another…
kills the potency (and purity) that makes every dynamic thrive.
‘Working on’ the relationship by focusing on and considering the other inevitably creates an energetically limp (attached / codependent / diluted) experience for both parties, despite how intense this dysfunctional bond might feel.
It’s a poor facsimile of the pure fire you actually crave that only comes from never leaving home.
From working on THIS; not that.
Because THIS is all there is and that will adjust accordingly.
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We Do Until We Don't (An Essay)
I now laugh at the fact that I ever looked outside of myself for anything.
And…
I understand why I chose to self-abandon as a youngin (and beyond) in the first place.
The same reason any of us do.
That is, until we don’t.
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The Real Culprit (Mandy Bite)
The other isn't the reason that you deviate from YOU.
The other is the excuse you use to abandon what is true.
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The Stretch of Self-Abandonment (An Essay)
You can feel when you leave yourself for another.
And when they leave themself for you.
The tainted stretch of self-abandonment is palpable.
It feels sticky and icky and gross and not right.
If the energy was a visual, you’d see how unnatural and misshapen it looks.
How unattractive it is.
And how messy and distorted things become when one chooses not to remain in their power.
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The Anger is on You (An Essay)
The extent of your anger, frustration and resentment towards another, is in direct proportion to the extent you’ve compromised, denied, silenced or abandoned yourself ‘for the sake’ of said person / relationship, which was never required, but chosen, for your perceived benefit (and to your actual detriment); not theirs.
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